Christmas Song Teclado

	  (LITTLE BOY'S VOICE) 

A 
Hey Santa Claus you c***! Where's me fucking bike? 
E                                                             A 
I've unwrapped all this other junk, and there's nothing that I like. 
A                                  D 
I wrote you a fucking letter, and I come to see you twice. 
A                          E                      A           
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fucking bike. 
A 
If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I'd have bloody asked. 
A                                              E 
And this cowboy suit and ping pong set, you can shove right up your arse! 
A 
You've stuffed me bloody order up. 
D 
It's enough to make you spew. 
A 
And I'm not the only one who's snakey, 
E                A 
Me sisters dirty too! 


(LITTLE GIRL'S VOICE) 

A 
Hey Santa Claus you c***! Where's me fucking pram? 
E                                                      A    
You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am? 
A                                       D 
Cause I'm the little girl, who you made sit right on your hand. 
A 
I'll give you fucking ho ho ho, 
E                     A 
You forgot me fucking pram. 


(LITTLE BOY'S VOICE) 

A 
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts. 
E                                                            A                                                  
And I'll let your fucking reindeer go, and kick Rudolf in the nuts! 
A                                   D 
You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store. 
A 
And me and me little sister,  
E                         A 
Come stomping through the door. 

(NC- SPOKEN) 
And we'll say, yeah you wait for it 

A 
Hey mums and dads you smell his breath, and check his bloodshot eyes. 
E                                                              A                                                             
And don't listen to him boys and girls, 'cause he tells fucking lies. 
A                                            D   
He's just a piss tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright. 
A 
Cause the old fucking wanker,  
E                 A 
Forgot me fucking bike. 

(NC- SPOKEN) 

You wait you old c***, I'm gonna dob you in. 

Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your fucking lights out. 

(SING TO FADE) 
"I saw mummy sucking Santa Claus"